WE'RE PREGNANT!!!!!!
Wow, what a huge week! I would have never imagined that this week would be so huge. I haven't really had time to write since most of this has been making phone calls to everyone who has stood by me in the moments of sorrow, dispair, frustration, anger and sadness.
The day started last Saturday while Robert and I waited for my car to be fixed....again. As we were waiting I said to Robert "hey do you remember when my last period was?"It was my way of giving him a hint that I was thinking that it could happen. Ok, so I have had this thought many a time over the last 5 years! I told myself that if I did not start my period by Monday then I would take a pregnancy test.
Monday February 12th, I was at the grocery store picking up things for Stephanie's 30th birthday potluck. I had the pregnancy test and thought several times "Why are you doing this to yourself?" I have had so many disappointments that the doubt was creaping in.
I put the stick in my pocket and Tiffany from Amgen came to drop some things off for patients.
We spoke of what has happened in the last few months, her worries, mine and then I confessed that I hadn't said anything to anyone else about the stick in my pocket. Her comment was that I should go do it now! Melissa peaked in ther head and I so wanted to say, WAIT! but I really didn't think that it would be positive since so many times before it was negative. I let tiffany go and then immeadiatly went to the bathroom. Like many times before I peed on the HPT and then didn't expect anything. Like all the other times, I didn't feel any different. Nausea occasionally but nothing more than I sometimes feel. IMMEADIATLY the HPT was positive!!!!
I was shaking and went to the computer to look this up online since I didn't feel completly positive that I was reading it right. Sure enough, I was.
I called Robert several times and couldn't get a hold of him. I called tiffany up on her cell and got her voicemail message. I think I was in shock. I can't even remember what I said. Just that I thought I was pregnant. I called Dr Szer several times and got voicemail. I think sent her a message via email.
A few minutes went by and Dr Sheets came in the room. He wasn't my first choice but I couldn't contain myself. With his back turned to me and on the computer i said "well since I can't get a hold of my husband, do you want to be the first one to know?" He said "What are you pregnant?He really spoiled my moment and then subsequently asked for me to get information for a patient. Of course I did but I was a little annoyed that my 5 years of waiting, lasted about 30 seconds in his brain!!!!
I took care of it and still trying to get a hold of Robert went to the lunchroom to find Melissa and stephanie. I saw Stephanie of course with a few people blocking her in her seating area and grabbed Melissa, as to not make a scene. I took her into Stephanie's office and told her I think "I'm pregnant". Melissa was floored. I think I shocked her. We hugged and I cried as I was in disbelief that this was actually happening. I spoke to my mom who was also very shocked and asked "how did this happen". My comment was almost to say "do you really want to tell you about the birds and the bees?" But I said the "normal"way or something simple like that.
I finally got a hold of Robert about 1230pm and I think I told him "I've been trying to get a hold of you for 30 minutes". He seemed a little annoyed but I said "no, it's a good thing. I took a pregnancy test, and I think I'm pregnant". I can't tell you his exact words because it was all a fog. But he was STUNNED and silent at the same time. He said he wanted to hug me through the phone. We said we loved each other and I cried again as I had imagined many times before how I would tell Robert that we were pregnant. Oh well, I guess that's overrated:-)
I told a few people but of course in my excitement I continued to tell Andrea, Christina, Sally, and a few other people that have seen me through this hard time and have been my prayer warriors. Well my hands are hurting and I will have to continue the next few days and the great day I had today with seeing the sac in the uterus. Praise God that the baby is not in the fallopian tube with the mess that I have on my reproductive organs. I have only God to thank for the character that He gave me and the hope that I had in these long 5 years. How the trials that I endured were for a reason and that the WAIT was worth it.