Proverbs 16:9 "A man's heart deviseth his way; but the Lord directeth his steps".
I am your Lord. Lord of your lives, Controller of your days, your present and your future. Leave all plans to Me. Only act as I bid you. You have entered now, both of you, upon the God-guided life. Think what that means. God-taught, God-guided. Is anything too wonderful for such a life? Do you begin to see how wonderful life with Me can be? Do you see that no evil can befall you?
I do know that God is in control of our lives especially now since we have no idea if our babies have buried themselves to make their home. I know that I will Praise His name above all others. Our babies are His and we will give them to Him and bring them up to Honor Him. I remember my dear friend Kara today who went through her transfer today. I pray that her embies are also making their home inside her today.
I just wanted to write down my thoughts about the transfer yesterday. Kathryn the embryologist showed us our picture of the embies. All five survived. We have one that hatched on it's own and what is the fetus is actually coming out of the shell. The four from the last cycle were still good/good quality. The embryologist grade this on the inner cell mass which is the fetus and trophectoderm cells that are the placenta. Sometimes they can actually have fragmentation and breakdown during the thawing process but our four didn't change at all. Her comment on the other one was that it did change a little but was still graded good/fair and was still "alive".
We decided to transfer all five. Dr Hummel reminds me a little of Mr Rogers in that he explains things like a story and described everything he was doing. It was great to know that he took his time and as he was guiding the catheter into the uterus and noticing how much fluid I have in my pelvis. I'm not sure when this happened but it seems that since our 3rd cycle, I've had this.
The transfer itself is not painful but feels like when they dilate you during a pelvic exam. They put in a vaginal ultrasound and then push in a catheter that does feel a little like cramping. You can visualize it on the ultrasound machine as he pushes the catheter in. It feels like pressure that you have to use the bathroom. You just can't let it bother you too much that the RE is sitting underneath you (staring at your crouch) and telling me detail by detail what he's doing. Then you can see your embryos on the monitor and they intercom the embryologist as she scoops up the embryos into the catheter. They shut off all the lights as the embryos are sensitive to light. She hands off the embryos to the RE and he will push the embryos through the catheter thats allready in place. You can visualize the fluid contatining the embryos on the screeen as they land in the "sweet spot" of the uterus. As soon as they are placed he will have the embryologist go back and visualize that all embryos are not left in the catheter. Sometimes, I guess they can get stuck. I lay there for 30 minutes and then back home for 3 days of bedrest and twice daily progesterone shots as my body is not making progesterone right now. I continue this and esterace until the day of pregnancy test.
Just wanted to write these things down since eventually I'll forget what these moments were like when we went through this. Praying for my embies that they have made their home and will grow strong.